| 1 | Amazing Trivia Part 1 Preview: I admit it .. I LIKE trivia, tho it serves no purpose for me since I can never remember any to bring up in conversation. But still, it is fun, so I\'ve created this list of amazing trivia that I found to be absolutely riveting. 1. Snails can sleep up to 3 years. Not so amazing actually since I managed to sleep thru 6 years of jr. high and high... (more) Published By: Jan Michaels Submitted: 12 January, 2006 |
| 2 | My Baloney Has a First Name and Other Shallow Thoughts Preview: The tobacco industry must be stopped. I've felt that way ever since I quit smoking. No one should have to suffer from Alzheimer's with memory prices so low. Nothing slows you down more than your cat catching a paw in your laser printer. My baloney has a first name, it's f-a-t-t-y. My wife washed my Odor Eaters, and put Bounce in the dryer. Yo... (more) Published By: Joe Hickman Submitted: 15 June,2005 |
| 3 | Go Ahead - Make Dad's Day Preview: Throughout the year, many days of celebration are tucked capriciously into the calendar. So much so, it is hard to find any day of the year where something or someone is not being observed, which has benefited the greeting card company, you can be sure. I'm not positive, but I think they've had a great deal to do with designating these days. Some... (more) Published By: Rev. James L. Snyder Submitted: 17 June,2005 |
| 4 | Dear Guy Preview: Coming soon. About the Author None... (more) Published By: Erik Sheppard Submitted: 21 June,2005 |
| 5 | Halfway Through Summer - Are We Having Fun Yet Preview: Today is Thursday the 23rd of June and we’re almost halfway through the summer can you believe it. It seem to me that you wait and wait to get past the winter (at least here in the Northeast) then some years a wet soggy spring and finally your rewarded with sunny warm weather. Once it arrives you run madly around getting your yard ready for ou... (more) Published By: Bonnie P. Carrier Submitted: 23 June,2005 |
| 6 | Hand me my Thongs! Preview: When I was a fart, thongs were somewhat different to what they are now. As I understood it, thongs were made of steel, cast iron and brass. I remember using my neighbours thongs on a regular basis, to put coal into the fire. I also remember using the very same thongs to put ice into vodkas and other beverages, excluding hot whiskeys. Now if I'm ... (more) Published By: Thck Mick Submitted: 25 June,2005 |
| 7 | A Georgia Superhero! Preview: One thing I’ve loved since I was a little boy were superheroes. Believe me, I read so many Superman and Batman comic books when I was a kid that it’s not even funny. I loved their varied super powers, and how they constantly got out of scrapes that would have destroyed any normal man. I was so into them that I also became big fans of the Flash, Sp... (more) Published By: Ed Williams Submitted: 26 June,2005 |
| 8 | Taking A Little Time Out For Time Preview: Today's topic, ladies and gentleman, is: Time. We're going to talk about time today because I never seem to have enough of it. And I figure that if I dedicate a whole column to the subject of time and stress some of it's finer points, then perhaps Father Time will show his appreciation by granting me a few extra hours each day. This will allow ... (more) Published By: Timothy Ward Submitted: 28 June,2005 |
| 9 | Make A Small Fortune In The Fishing Industry... Preview: Make Small Fortune In Fishing Industry... ....now there is a headline you don't see very often.In fact, I have never seen it. Unless you start out with a large fortune and slowly pitter it away while in pursuit of our friends who live beneath the waves, most people don't enter the exciting world of the fishing industry to seek fame and fortune... (more) Published By: A.J. Klott Submitted: 30 June,2005 |
| 10 | JEEPERS CREEPERS IT'S JULY! Preview: Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005. JEEPERS CREAPERS IT'S JULY! -- Odd Events & Activities Calendar for July 2005 -- Compiled by: Beatrice Blitterlees & Earl Craboon July is one of the most popular jocund, jocose, and jocular months of the year. In a nutshell, this means one can be jestful, merry, playful and witty without fear of becoming a ... (more) Published By: B. Blitterlees and E. Craboon Submitted: 30 June,2005 |
| 11 | Learning To Be Funny Preview: For some people, being funny can be a bit of a challenge. As a matter of fact, I used to be one of them. When I would try to tell a joke that wasn't made up by someone else, people would look at me with an expression that said, "Would you like... a straight jacket!?!" Most humor contains an element of surprise. One way to create this is putting ... (more) Published By: Bryan Brewster Submitted: 01 July,2005 |
| 12 | The Bare Truth About My Butt Quiz Preview: Forget about the SAT, never mind the FCAT, and remove forever from you mind any thoughts about the ACT. All these test pale in comparision to the examination that I just failed. Failing those test may have minor repurcussions like never making it into college and therefore being forced to work at fast food resturants well into you 40's. That's no... (more) Published By: Timothy Ward Submitted: 04 July,2005 |
| 13 | Country Pastimes 2: Bale surfing Preview: Since the demise of foxhunting and 'hunting with dogs' in the countryside, there are thousands of dispossessed toffs wandering around with nothing to do. To compensate we offer here the new shape of extreme and dangerous landsports. 2. Bale surfing The new shape of hay bales has created the little known country sport of 'bale surfing'. Please ... (more) Published By: Simon Mitchell Submitted: 05 July,2005 |
| 14 | THE TWISTED-TONGUE TOURNAMENT Preview: Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005 THE TWISTED-TONGUE TOURNAMENT -- Or, Calling All Weird-Word Whizbangers! -- **By Adrian Air-of-Sleet, a pleasure-seeking, mandolin-playing, maroon-hairpiece sort of fellow who enjoys Italian weddings, spelling bees, and the Calgary Stampede** While I was perusing several dog-eared magazines hanging from the ... (more) Published By: Adrian Air-of-Sleet Submitted: 05 July,2005 |
| 15 | Country Pastimes 3: Impromptu farm concerts Preview: Since the demise of foxhunting and hunting with dogs in the countryside, there are thousands of dispossessed toffs wandering around with nothing to do. To compensate we offer here the new shape of country activities. I was in the garden playing a guitar that attracted the attention of a small bird. It positioned itself overhead in the willow tr... (more) Published By: Simon Mitchell Submitted: 05 July,2005 |
| 16 | A WORD ABOUT "INTELLIGENT" SHOES & DUMB SOULS Preview: Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005. A WORD ABOUT "INTELLIGENT" SHOES & DUMB SOULS -- Or, Boosting Your Boots' IQ ...But Still Running Around in Circles? -- **By Professor Ovid Publius Hadweenzic, a latitudinarian linguist from the University of Ecum Secum in Old Sweat, Nova Scotia (with an abiding interest in the history of fetish footwear, how... (more) Published By: O.P. Hadweenzic Submitted: 08 July,2005 |
| 17 | HOW TO CANOODLE WITH A CANUCK IN A CANOE Preview: Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005. HOW TO CANOODLE WITH A CANUCK IN A CANOE --Or, Welcome to Climax, Saskatchewan! Canada is a pretty straight-laced, peaceful place, where seldom is heard a discouraging word and the skies are not cloudy all day, except for eleven and a half months of the year affectionately called "winter", (when everyone goe... (more) Published By: Theolonius McTavish Submitted: 09 July,2005 |
| 18 | Do you suffer from too much GAS? Preview: It is well documented that too much gas can be detrimental. Gas can cause severe stomach cramps.Certain gases can be harmful to the enviroment.Other gases can consume oxygen, and basically "smother" you.Particular diets can be related to gas.Heavy gases can even cause back ache, lumbago, shoulder injury, etc.. You can check the following image ... (more) Published By: Mixedlexia Submitted: 09 July,2005 |
| 19 | Tranni D’Electric and why men are such pleasant pigs! Preview: My daddy always said that men are great with a shovel. My mammy always said that women are great at emotional issues. I say that men are pleasant pigs and women are pleasant pig observers. Since I left high school, my opinions have been gradually changing. I used to think that boys were smelly but now I’m sure. I used to think that men are smelli... (more) Published By: Tranni D'Electric. Submitted: 09 July,2005 |
| 20 | A moron's account of 4th grade. Preview: Ah looking back on 4rth grade, it was not my favorite grade, 3erd grade was my favorite grad butt when I think about all the grades I had in school 4rth grade was not a bad grade. My teacher for 4rth grade was Mister Tony, he was a very smart and very nice teacher and he was also the biggest teacher in all my grades. Back before he decided to be... (more) Published By: greggb Submitted: 10 July,2005 |